Where To Start?

I have been dreaming of writing a book ever since I was a child. Once I finally realized what I needed to say to the world, I entered this loop of writing, hesitating, getting stuck, then giving up. I refuse to give up this time. 

What I need to voice to the world doesn't need to be said though describing every detail and step of my life. So I decided to take a new approach, this approach. Taking the book's bullet points and putting them out now, make an impact now instead of waiting for myself to piece them all together for a book. 

Big words, fancy sentences, screw all that. I'm here to tell you my story and to share what it means to be a part of the queer community. I'm here to expand on the importance of mental health and queer representation. But I am just one man, and I can only reach so far. And so if I only capture your attention for a bare moment, may you leave with this at least: 

Be kind to those around you, you never know what's going on in their own lives, in their own heads. Walk into conversations, interactions and relationships with curiosity in place of judgment. We can only learn and love each other fully if we put down our weapons and lower our defenses. 

As we continue, I'd like to mention that these words are authentic. This is my story, and its telling will not be perfect because absolute perfection is not within human capabilities. However, it will be true. And so, before we fully dive in, I find it important to mention the contents of the posts that may follow this publication. It will not be all rainbows and unicorns. There will be mentions of self harm, verbal and sexual abuse, failed suicide attempts, as well as homophobia, transphobia, and hate crimes.

I would like to prepare you here and now because there is blood on our pride flags and I will not hide it. The strength of this community didn't come from nothing. And I will speak about all of it because without the cruel details, resilience, and growth, my story would not be accurate.

One more thing before you go:

I would like to take a moment to acknowledge that while I am in the queer community, I don't automatically know everything about every queer identity, experience, or label. There are so many aspects of the queer community of which I am still not perfectly familiar with and there is no shame in that! The only experience and story that I know truly and deeply is my own. I won’t claim to know everything about what it means to be a trans man, because every transgender person is different. We may have a few things in common regarding our identities, but our stories, personalities, and experiences may be entirely different.

There is no single way to be queer. The beauty of the LGBTQIA+ community is that it's a community, not a box. Two people may both play the same sport, but that singular characteristic does not automatically mean that they know everything about each other.  I am here to share my story, hoping some will relate or maybe learn something new, or maybe not! Everyone's paths are valid but this is the route that I walked.